James and I began this blog at the very beginning of our pregnancy with Wyatt to share and update our new adventures as we became pregnant and start the new season of parenthood. Sixteen weeks into pregnancy, I had to go into surgery to ensure our son would not come too early and shortly after, we found out Wyatt has Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia (CDH). This is our humble attempt at being transparent and hopefully sharing the joys and love of Christ through this roller coaster ride we're on. And now to share even more with the new miracle on the way.

Sunday, December 7, 2014

Finding God's Joy in His Redeeming Love

This is a tough one to write.  
Baby Boy is good so it's not that, Praise the Lord.  Just a big heart issue for me.... 

First thing first, a general life update... 

Wyatt's new cast.

PS... in this new cast, it comes down further and we have a difficult time keeping his pants up.  We were walking around Lowes this weekend and a sales lady had to inform us his pants were around his ankles.  haha.  whoops.  He kept up great waddling like a penguin!  
Wyatt is in cast #2.  It's bigger and heavier than than the first one.  I didn't think that was possible but obviously it is.  And this one is green.  I considered asking for red and green stripes but I wasn't sure how they'd respond. lol.  

Waiting to get his new cast.

in my arms recovering from getting cast #2

He was allergy snotty going in but they said since he wasn't fevering or hadn't been they were okay with him going under anesthesia.  When he came out after getting his new cast, we were taking him from the room he's in right out of coming out of sleeping to our recovery room and he started vomiting.  That's never happened before.  While it was a little alarming because it was new, we also weren't too worried because he throws up all the time.  

Waiting to get cast #1 off. 

At home post cast #1 removal.  He was very itchy and limp noodle for a while.  
Wyatt itches

The nurses called the anesthesiologist and she ordered zophran (sp?).  I knew I had heard that name before but couldn't place what it was.  As the nurse was connect the syringe to his IV, I asked what it was for and she said it's an anti vomiting med and before she could push it in, it hit me!  He cannot have that one!  It was prescribed by his previous pediatrician's office and the pharmacist caught that he can't have that  because of his heart history and the daily puffer he takes.  It could make his heart race.  

Wyatt plays.


I can see his neck!

a haircut!!

So they called the hospitals pharmacist and they said yes, it's common to not administer that med in Wyatt's circumstance.  And the nurses called back to the doctor.  She unfortunately said if he throws up again to give it to him anyway.  The nurses looked at us while they were still on the phone repeating/confirming what she was saying so we could hear.  I just shook my head "NO!"  And when they hung up, I stated out loud that in no way will I allow them to give it to him.  I will take what two pharmacist say with caution over one doctor's word any day.  Thankfully he didn't throw up again and we didn't have to cross that bridge.  


Celebrating our cast free day with a trip to the Gaylord ICE!  It was VERY cold! 



We have spoken to our orthopedic doctor's nurse and have made sure she has noted that we will not accept that anesthesiologist caring for Wyatt ever again.  :-)  


He LOVED having his cast off. 


Wyatt adjusted out and back in his cast famously.  He (and we) absolutely LOVED having his cast off.  He took a few baths, a shower, got a haircut, went to the playground and just took in every hug he (we) could.  He literally had a PEP in his step.  James and I so 
badly wanted to not take him the morning of his casting.  A nurse called the afternoon before and asked, "Are y'all planning on coming in the morning?" and I had to think about it.  lol.  But we know this is best in the long run.  



melt my heart



Since the cast is heavier and bulkier, Wyatt seems to tire faster.  We find him laying down playing more.  {I totally need to sweep and mop more now, lol.}  But he's still happy and takes it in stride.  


lots of naked time.  I won't post the diaper free pics. 



The reason we got to have his cast off for a day was so that he could have a cardiology check up.  Dr. Gibbin has cleared Wyatt from her service.  His heart looks perfect!  :-)  He will need to go in just to have the device in his chest looked at and checked on in 2 years but that's it.  Praise the Lord!  


waiting for his echo cardiogram 

fell asleep 

We love Dr. Gibbin! 

Wyatt had his first REAL virus last week.  He's had minor 24 hourish things go on but this was a fever for 6 days.  Oh my!  He made it through like a champ though.  He did have lots of snot which equals congestion and throw up.  So we did live off tube feeds for those days.  I was worried he might not want to go back to the hard work of eating but he's done well, thankfully.  


tickles with Daddy!



My sick boy spent a few days in that exact spot.  



21 Weeks



Yup!  Can you believe it?  I'm over half way through this pregnancy!  Wow!  

As each appointment approaches I prepare myself, instinctively, for bad news.  With Wyatt, historically, we get going on upside and life begins to reflect a more "normal" and then we get news of a setback.  So, I find myself waiting for that other shoe to drop with this sweet baby boy.  I keep thinking I'm going to hit that magic point in time where I get to be excited about this healthy baby boy and it hasn't happened yet.  I thought the 20 week sonogram would be it and it wasn't.  I know living in this fear is sinful and it's not trusting the Lord.  I want to live in His joy.  He is redeeming the hurts from Wyatt's sicknesses and I'm choosing this fear over his joy.  I'm hoping as I get to see his healthy body at each appointment (every 2 weeks), I feel more and more healing and get to live more and more in the joy of His redeeming love.  I know it's a process and I have to trust Him in His plan and process.  It's a lesson I feel like He is continually teaching me.  

Bless the LORD, O my soul,

and all that is within me,
bless his holy name!
and forget not all his benefits,
Bless the LORD, O my soul,
who heals all your diseases,
who forgives all your iniquity,
who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy,
who redeems your life from the pit,
who satisfies you with good
The LORD works righteousness
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.
and justice for all who are oppressed.
slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.
He made known his ways to Moses,
his acts to the people of Israel.
The LORD is merciful and gracious,
nor repay us according to our iniquities.
He will not always chide,
nor will he keep his anger forever.
He does not deal with us according to our sins,
as far as the east is from the west,
For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him;
so far does he remove our transgressions from us. As a father shows compassion to his children,
so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him.
For he knows our frame;
he remembers that we are dust.

(Psalm 103:1-14 ESV)



______________________


19 Then they cried to the LORD in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress. 20 Hesent out his word and healed them, and delivered them from their destruction. 21 Let them thank the LORD for his steadfast love, for his wondrous works to the children of man!
(Psalm 107:19-21)

2 O LORD my God, I cried to you for help, and you have healed me.
(Psalm 30:2)

3 He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
(Psalms 147:3)

14 Heal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved, for you are my praise.
(Jeremiah 17:4)



He heals.  He redeems.  He loves.  He is gracious.  He is merciful.  He is steadfast.  He is in control.  


____________________


20 weeks


How far along? 21.5 Weeks

Total weight gain: about 7ish pounds

Maternity clothes?  Maternity pants and tops.     

Stretch marks?  Nope.  Praise be to God! 

Sleep:  I have to get up at least once to potty usually and the dreams are ridiculous!  I remember having a vivid dream here and there with Wyatt but it is nightly and a lot of the time, multiple times a night.  It stinks when it’s a dream where I am angry or frustrated because I wake up feeling that way and it’s difficult to go back to sleep.  But other than that, sleep is great.  LOL. 

Best moment this week:  His official anatomy scan!  The doctors have been looking every two weeks so there were no surprises.  PTL.  He is a healthy baby boy, growing right on track where he should be.    

Miss Anything?  Caffeine.

Movement:  Yes, frequently.  Seems to be about the same amount as Wyatt.      

Food cravings:  Anything not good for me.  I try to resist.  J

Anything making you queasy or sick:  nah.    

Gender:  It’s still a boy!

Symptoms:  Growing belly and energy return.    

Belly Button in or out?   In.

Wedding rings on or off?   On.

Happy or Moody most of the time:  Happy.

Looking forward to:   Naming this little man cub!  Lol.      








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